Snack time

I just discovered heaven, and it’s called a Cheetoh.

Or at least I think that’s what it’s called. After all, I can’t exactly read.

"Chee-toh, Cheet-oh, Cheeeeeet-ooooooh ..."

Oh, little orange crunchy thing, where have you been all of my life?

Unlike my bro Cous, my Mom throws me a people snack every once in a while. Sorry, Cous, I guess she loves me more than she loves you. (Now this is where I would insert a smiley face if I had an opposable thumb, assuming, of course, that I even knew how to type. But I digress.)

Maybe it's because I don't have many teeth to begin with and these little crunchy things sure are sticky. 

So, less teeth, less things to stick to. I get it. 

Whatever ... these Cheetohs are super delicious. And have you seen what they do to a set of fingers — orange stuff everywhere.

Alas, who am I kidding?

If I had the chance to stick my whole face into a bag of delicious Cheetohs I would be in absolute bliss. Orange nose be damned!

OK, so what to do about sticky teeth?

Smack, smack, smack ...

Even though I only have a half-dozen or so left in my mouth from a lifetime of crunching rocks. Don't ask, that's a story for another time. It still may be something I can use to cash in on another one of my favorite treats — a green chewy bone that I hear leaves my breath smelling minty fresh. 

How to get Mom's attention?

What about a whine? That should do the trick.

I'll also play to her guilt by making her wonder how she could have given me such a nasty orange thing with no way to clean the disgusting grime off my teeth.

It should work. 

"Whhhhhmmmm, whhhmmmm, hmmmmm, whhhhhhhhm ..."

Oh, yeah, and add in some quick puppy eyes. 

"Whhhhhmmmm, whhhmmmm, hmmmmm, whhhhhhhhm ..."

One, two, three — hello — can you hear me?

Bingo!

Ah, a green squishy bone, just what the doctor ordered.

Teeth good and clean, and breath minty fresh. 

Now time for another Cheetoh.

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